CommonSenseAtWork Blog

Bullies are a fact of life in the workplace, especially during

times of recession. Nearly one fourth of employees in the United States have suffered from bullying and abrasive management.

“The pain and degradation of workplace bullying shatters lives nationwide,” declare Drs. Ruth and Gary Namie in their book The Bully At Work…What You Can Do To Stop The Hurt and Reclaim Your Dignity On The Job.

They say, “The fear, shame and loss of dignity that originate at work can then creep into every other aspects of a bullying victim’s life, affecting friends and family members.”

Those who are on the receiving end of bullying can suffer a loss of selfesteem and self confidence. Bullying causes health problems and devastation of family life. Productivity suffers.

The Namies identify four classic types of bullies:

1. The Constant Critic–extremely negative, nitpicker, perfectionist, whiner, complainer.

2. Two-Headed Snake–passive aggressive, indirect, dishonest style of dealing with people and issues, pretends to be nice while sabotaging you.

3. Gatekeeper–needs to control all resources, deliberately cuts the victims out of the communication loop.

4. Screaming Mimi–controls through fear and intimidation, emotionally out of control, impulsive, explosive, threatens physical violence.

Haunted by their own inadequacies, bullies often target those who are bright, creative, self-assured; in other words, those people they see as threats. Sixty-three percent have some college or a college degree; 78 percent are between ages of 24 and 46.

The Namies do an excellent job in exploring the reasons behind bullies and how their malevolence is manifest. Most importantly they explain in real-world terms what victims can do to ward off and defeat bullies. I recommend this book.

I wish you career success!

Ramon Greenwood, The Career Coach

Common Sense At Work

If you are the get-things-done type, sooner or later you will come in conflict with your boss.

The reality is that if you do not have periodic disagreements with your supervisors you are probably not being as assertive as you should be in moving your career ahead.

These conflicts can prove to be hazardous to the health of your career if they are not handled with common sense.

No one enjoys conflict, especially with the boss.  But when you have an honest difference of opinion, it is better to pay the price of discomfort and take the risk of some penalty than to bottle up the frustration and nagging conscience that results from not meeting what you see as your responsibilities.

Career Tips: How To Turn Conflicts To Your Advantage

There are nine steps you can take to lessen the damage that can result from conflicts with your boss. In fact, you can turn these conflicts to your advantage.

1.  The first step is to concisely define the issue– preferably in writing– so that you have a clear understanding as to what the controversy is all about.  Determine how important it is to the parties involved and to the organization.

If it is not truly important beyond your personal feelings, forget it.  Save your energies for another time when the stakes are significant.

2. Give full consideration to the points of view of all parties concerned, especially the boss. His responsibilities are different than yours.  He may have a legitimate reason for his opinion, which you are not aware of at the moment.  The conflict you see may disappear with an explanation.

3. Weigh your reasons and objectives against the good of the organization.  Before you “go to the mat” on an issue, be sure you are motivated by what you believe to be the larger interest and not just your own narrowly defined agenda.

4. Ask for a face-to-face discussion with your boss if, after due consideration, you still feel the difference is worth pursuing.  If the matter is not resolved with a meeting, ask permission to leave a written explanation with your boss for his further consideration.

5.  Never push your boss into a corner where he has no room for compromise.  Do not air the conflict with your boss in the presence of others.

6.  Avoid letting the matter be positioned on a personal basis.  Emotions and personalities have no place in a confrontation with the boss.

7.  Be tactful.  Show respect for the boss’s position and responsibilities.  Whatever the outcome of your differences with him, he is still your boss.

8.  Keep the matter in perspective.  It is good to remember that win, lose or draw, it is a rare situation when the resolution of an issue results in a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow or the world coming to an end.

9. Don’t pin a medal on your chest if you prevail or wear the black of mourning if the decision goes the other way.  Get on with the job. If you have been heard and the boss still doesn’t agree, be a good trooper, support his decision, openly and aggressively. If the outlook is contrary to your basic values look for another job.

If you can’t discuss the inevitable conflicts with your boss in a free and open manner so as to arrive at acceptable resolutions, or if such disagreements are so frequent and painful that your life and career are being disrupted, recognize you have a problem larger than any single issue.  It may be that you are at odds with the standards and objectives of the boss or the organization.  Or the personal chemistry between you and your boss may be out of balance.

Then, your options are clear: resolve the conflicts,  live with them, or locate another opportunity.  Life is too short to exist in a world of turmoil and confrontations.

I wish you career success!

Ramon Greenwood, The Career Coach

Common Sense At Work

Bad behavior by bosses such as selfishness, impulsiveness stubbornness, impatience and harsh, undue criticism are on the increase, according to studies comparing five years–2004 through 2008.

“In stressful times, such as a recession or a frenzied work pace, childish, bad boss behavior are exacerbated,” declares Lynn Taylor, author of TAME YOUR TERRIBLE OFFICE TYRANT.

According to Ms. Taylor, employees in the United States spend almost 20 hours a week worrying about “what a boss says or does.”

Bad-boss behavior goes into overdrive during periods of high unemployment and economic stress. Obviously, this distracts employees from the work at hand. Productivity falls off. Everyone loses.

Of course, there is no reasonable excuse for such behavior; but none the less the reality is that much of it should be brushed off to cut the boss a little slack. Remember he or she is under enormous pressure, just as you are. Besides, with conditions in the job market such as they are, this is not a good time to challenge the boss and put your position at risk.

Instead, see if there are steps you can take to relieve the pressure on the boss and help him improve his performance.

I wish you success!

Ramon Greenwood, Head Career Coach

Common Sense At Work

People losing their jobs; survivors being asked to take on more duties, often with fewer resources; businesses going bankrupt; mortgages being called. These conditions translate in to more tension and apprehension in the workplace.

“People are feeling anxious, so they’re being short-tempered, passive and unproductive,” says Martin Yate, a career adviser at GoSavant.com>

In this environment people tend to hunker down. They spend a lot of time looking over their shoulders, afraid to take chances and assume more responsibility for fear they will make mistakes.

Negative Impact On Careers

The result is that careers are slowed down, even stalled or derailed, because advancements can only come by taking calculated risks and reaching out to take on more responsibility.

“Tough as it is for cautious people like me to accept, if you don’t take calculated gambles you won’t get ahead as quickly as those who do,” declares Alexandra Levit, a columnist for The Wall Street Journal. “You will also never get over your fear of the unknown and life will be predictable and dull.”

So, saddle up and go forward with all the vigor you can muster with common sense to take reasonable risks in improving your performance and profitability of the organization that employs you.

Recognize that everyone who successfully travels a rewarding career path makes mistakes at one time or another. The only people who don’t make mistakes are those who sit around in isolation contemplating their navels.

Minimize Fallout From Mistakes

Here are eight steps you can take to minimize the fallout from your inevitable mistakes.

1. Don’t retreat into a shell of self-denial, hoping the error will correct itself. Chances are it won’t. Assess the situation. Get all the facts. Why did the mistake occur? How much damage did it cause? Why did it occur? What lessons can be learned, so as to avoid a repeat performance. What’s the worst thing that can happen?

2. Admit your error. If an apology is in order, speak up right away with sincerity. Report the situation, unvarnished, immediately to your boss. Sooner or later your mistake will surface anyway. By stepping up promptly you are in a better position to exercise damage control.

Centuries ago Confucius, the Chinese philosopher, advised, “Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.”

It’s natural to feel regret, even humiliation, and try to act as if the incident never happened. Don’t go down that path. Your boss and your associates are certain to be ticked off if you seem to not care that you made a mistake.

3. Have a plan to correct the mistake.

4. The first rule of damage control after a mistake is to reveal all of the facts immediately. Unwanted attention on your error is renewed when you dribble out the story bit by bit.

5. Accept responsibility. Don’t blame others. It’s easy and tempting to get defensive and look for scapegoats. That sort of behavior only exacerbates the problem.

6. Be prepared to receive some criticism from your boss and your associates. Listen carefully. Is it valid? If so, learn from it. Expect that some of the negative feedback will be simply carping, probably from those who envy your courage in stepping up and taking responsibility. Don’t even think about retaliating. You’ll only make matters worse. Look ahead.

7. It’s okay to feel the pain, even to mourn a little, but don’t make a hair shirt part of your wardrobe. Get back up, dust yourself off and go back to work full speed.

8. Once you’ve processed the mistake, learned from the experience and started remedial actions. Then leave the misstep behind.

The only truly unforgivable mistake is to repeat a mistake.

I wish you career success!

Ramon Greenwood, Head Career Coach

Common Sense At Work

To read more of Ramon Greenwood’s common sense work advice on how to protect and advance your career during tough times, sign up for a free subscription to his widely read e-newsletter and  participate in his blog at http://www.CommonSenseAtWork.com> He coaches from a successful career as Senior VP at American Express, author of career-related books, and a senior executive/consultant in Fortune 500 companies.

The news media rarely skip a day in reporting the grim economic news and calculating the number of jobs lost in the United States since the recession started in December, 2007.

But those reports do not take into full account the collateral damage caused among family, friends and co-workers of those who have lost their jobs.

Survivors of the axe have to deal with a variety of emotions: mourning over those who have been fired; worry about the increased work load to pick up the slack; anger and resentment at those who made the decision to fire people; and outright fear that they may be the next on the chopping block.

It is very difficult dealing with these deep feelings. But deal with them survivors must if they want to achieve career success.

Helpful Career Advice For Coping

Career coaches provide helpful advice on coping with the situation.

It is therapeutic to recognize nobody is happy with layoffs. The boss is dealing with some of the same issues that you and your colleagues are. Unless the boss is an outright sociopath he is not going to be happy firing people.

It is all right to discuss the situation with your associates. In fact, it can be helpful as long as the discussion remains constructive. But do not–repeat, do not–let the discussions drift into finger pointing and criticism. Such griping is counter productive and is likely to get back to the boss. You don’t want to be tagged as a malcontent in these shaky times.

Share your worries and fears with family and friends. Keeping these emotions bottled up inside you is destructive. Besides, it is not fair to those who are affected by your fortunes if you suffer in silence.

Burnish your reputation for working hard. Document your accomplishments and make sure your employer is aware of your good work

Take On Extra Duties

It’s not a good idea to say “no” if you are asked to take on extra duties to fill the void left by firings. Don’t complain if you are asked to come in early and stay late.  In fact, it’s a good idea to volunteer to for special assignments.

Chances are everyone’s workload is being increased. If you are assigned more work than you can handle, ask for a review with your boss; not to complain, but to see if you can

prioritize your duties. Find out if it is possible to drop or reassign some of your tasks that may not be of great urgency. Suggest ways to improve your performance and that of your department, particularly if those changes reduce costs.

Learn New Career Skills

Learn new skills that will increase your value to your employer and enhance your chances of landing another job if you are let go.

Naturally, you want to know if more lay offs are coming. But even the boss may not know, or if he does, he probably will not be allowed to spread the news.

Still you can be alert to the information that is available about what’s happening with your own job, your department and your industry.

Be prepared to move on if you get the dreaded pink slip. Keep your resume up to date. Renew your network of contacts and references.

Accept the fact that beyond a certain point the future of your job will be powerfully impacted by forces beyond your control. Try not to obsess about it. Hang tough. These trying times will pass, and a new world of opportunity will emerge.

I wish you career success in 2010

Ramon Greenwood, Head Career Coach

Common Sense At Work